Thoughts About Push Presents

I first heard about push presents in an advertising campaign. Of course, like most women I liked the idea of my husband showing me he appreciated what I’d gone through with pregnancy and labor. I started to research more about the idea. What I found surprised me. There is almost as much resistance to the custom as there are supporters. Many opponents felt that the baby should be gift enough and that women who desired push presents were being ridiculous, entitlistic, and greedy. This caused me to reexamine my own motives. Did I want a push present for the sake of the gift?

No. I like the idea of a push present far more than the actual gift itself. I’m willing to bet many women feel the same way. I want my husband to appreciate what I did the same way he wants me to appreciate when he accomplishes something difficult. The gift is secondary to that. Sure jewelry or flowers are nice and sure the gift makes a great heirloom to pass down to your new child, but most of all I want my husband’s appreciation and support.

Although in some families it is a tradition to give a push present, there is no universal etiquette for the custom. The new father purchases a gift of some sort, typically jewelry, for the new mother after the baby is born as a thank you for “pushing” his baby out. The custom is common in India where gold is the usual gift and in England where eternity bands are popular.

American celebrities seem to have caught on to the trend as well. For example, Tori Spelling’s husband Dean McDurmott gave her a fifteen hundred dollar diaper bag when their son Liam was born. Gwyneth Paltrow received a “mama” pendent necklace, Sarah Jessica Parker and Kate Hudson got gold charm bracelets, while Jennifer Gardner was the recipient of a gold necklace with a diamond initial charm.

What do you think of the idea of a push present? Is it too greedy for woman to want her husband to get her a gift? What about the idea that it is an heirloom you can pass down to your child? Is occasionally helping with the baby enough of a gift? Wouldn’t it be nice for a new dad to show his appreciation to the new mom in a tangible way?

Public Speaking: How to Deliver Your Presentation Without Using Notes

Imagine walking on into a room to give an important public speaking presentation with your hands totally free. No notes, no loose papers – just a pleasant smile and a confident stride. Your audience would be impressed as soon as you stepped onto the platform and took the microphone. You would instantly have credibility among the members of the audience.

With a little public speaking know-how and intensive practice, you can deliver your presentation without using notes. The trick is to learn your material applying a technique called bits. A bit is a slice of material so closely related that it naturally flows from one point to the next. It lets you easily remember the points and deliver the material without notes. You may be surprised to learn that public speakers don’t memorize long speeches. They use bits to learn their speech and then memorize a few key words to trigger their thoughts.

Another advantage of using bits is you don’t have to carve out long blocks of time to practice your entire speech. You can use little short chunks of time to practice one bit, learn it well and then move on to another bit. Practice each bit repeatedly until you know it backwards and forwards. By the time the day of the event rolls around, you will have learned your entire speech.

In addition to making it easier for you to learn the parts of your speech, bits work especially well when giving a humorous presentation. They allow you to fire off funny stories back-to-back, with each one funnier than the one before. Test your humorous stories before you use them and rate them according to how much laughter you expect them to bring. Tell the least funny story first and then end with the funniest joke to build the intensity of laughter to its highest level.

One of the best things about using bits is that since you aren’t encumbered by notes, you can get much closer to your audience. Anytime you can walk out into your audience, you build rapport and increase your connection with them. That makes it more fun for them and for you.

Leave the notes at home. Your audience will be convinced you are an expert and head to the back of the room to buy your books and DVDs.

Public Speaking – Five Mistakes To Avoid During a Technical Presentation

When someone tells you that you need to attend a technical presentation,
what is the first thing that goes through your mind? Do you imagine
yourself watching a parade of numbers, statistics, and data points?
Do you imagine an unending list of boring and unreadable PowerPoint

Unfortunately, this is frequently the case. Furthermore you will often
see the same mistakes from one speaker to another. You can distinguish
yourself from the majority of other speakers by avoiding the same
common mistakes.

Here are five things to avoid the next time you need to give a technical

  1. Drawing attention to your anxiety: “I’m sorry, I’m not used to doing speeches.” “I found out at the last minute that I had to do a speech and I didn’t have much time to prepare.” “I really don’t know what to say.” Too often, an inexperienced speaker will use one of these sentences (or variations thereof) to begin the speech. Generally, the speaker does so to apologize and to get clemency from the audience. In still further situations, that speaker will apologize every time he or she makes a mistake and will offer some excuse. The audience will notice on its own that you are ill at ease. When you mention it over and over, you only encourage them to pay attention to that fact. How do you avoid this issue? Here are a few solutions:
    • prepare as early as possible;
    • use humor when you make a mistake;
    • trust yourself when you speak to the audience;
    • focus on the needs of the audience, not on how you feel;
    • refuse to do the speech without adequate preparation time.
  2. Forgetting the audience: that is, forgetting to maintain constant contact with the audience. Speaking to a group is like a dialogue, even if there is only one person doing the speaking and the rest of the audience is only listening. Your role as a speaker is to make sure that your audience is following you throughout your speech. When you speak, maintain visual contact with your audience. Don’t get distracted by your PowerPoint slides, your notes, or anything else that takes your attention away from your audience. When you maintain visual contact with the audience, you can see in their eyes and in their posture if they understand, if they are paying attention, or if they are bored. This will allow you to adjust more easily to their state of mind.
  3. Incorrect use of PowerPoint: as a presentation tool, PowerPoint is overused. Furthermore, it is often improperly used:
    • it is used to show large amounts of text when it should be used to display visual information;
    • it’s used as a memory jogger instead of a presentation aid;
    • all the emphasis is put on the PowerPoint slides even though the slides should only add to the presentation.

    Most audiences are sick of PowerPoint presentations! Nevertheless, many speakers still believe that PowerPoint adds “professionalism” to their speech. This is only true if it is used effectively. Otherwise, it makes you look like an amateur. “Less is more” is a good philosophy when using PowerPoint. There is elegance in simplicity. A simple slide is more effective than an overcharged one. A slide with no animation is more appreciated than a slide that uses all of PowerPoint’s special effects. Don’t forget that PowerPoint, although it is meant to simplify your life, can often make it more complicated. With PowerPoint, you hope that your computer will not crash, that the projector will work, that there won’t be a power failure, that you won’t need to skip around in your slides, that everyone can see the screen, and so on. Without PowerPoint, there’s only one variable: you! And you have 100% control over that variable.

  4. Being too abstract: do we need a lexicon to understand your speech? Is your topic so abstract that the audience only hears words instead of seeing images? Most human beings retain information as images, sounds, or feelings. Rarely will they remember information as words or abstract concepts. In order for your audience to understand and remember what you say, you have to paint a picture in their minds. They need to be able to hear you and see a picture that accompanies your words. One of the best ways to do so is to give examples. In an academic situation, theoretical concepts don’t necessarily need an immediate practical application. But outside of academia, it’s important to translate what you say into a sensory experience for your audience. When your topic is very abstract, take the time to illustrate it with concrete and specific examples. The examples will help cement the information and help with understanding.
  5. No call to action: after your speech, what should your audience do? How can they apply your words to their lives? Many technical presentations end by default, rather than by design. The speaker presents information, answers a few questions, then leaves, expecting the audience to know exactly what to do afterwards. How often have you heard a speech with copious amounts of excellent information, but then had no idea where to begin using it or how to put it into practice? Don’t hesitate to tell the audience when and how to apply what you tell them.

A technical speech will lose its effectiveness and its usefulness
if it is not properly presented. The five points above are some of
the elements that can distract your audience and keep them from understanding
the information that you present.

These are points that can and should be taken into account during
your preparation, prior to standing before your audience. By taking
the necessary time for proper preparation, the speech will be better
structured, more convincing, and more useful to your audience.