Thoughts About Push Presents

I first heard about push presents in an advertising campaign. Of course, like most women I liked the idea of my husband showing me he appreciated what I’d gone through with pregnancy and labor. I started to research more about the idea. What I found surprised me. There is almost as much resistance to the custom as there are supporters. Many opponents felt that the baby should be gift enough and that women who desired push presents were being ridiculous, entitlistic, and greedy. This caused me to reexamine my own motives. Did I want a push present for the sake of the gift?

No. I like the idea of a push present far more than the actual gift itself. I’m willing to bet many women feel the same way. I want my husband to appreciate what I did the same way he wants me to appreciate when he accomplishes something difficult. The gift is secondary to that. Sure jewelry or flowers are nice and sure the gift makes a great heirloom to pass down to your new child, but most of all I want my husband’s appreciation and support.

Although in some families it is a tradition to give a push present, there is no universal etiquette for the custom. The new father purchases a gift of some sort, typically jewelry, for the new mother after the baby is born as a thank you for “pushing” his baby out. The custom is common in India where gold is the usual gift and in England where eternity bands are popular.

American celebrities seem to have caught on to the trend as well. For example, Tori Spelling’s husband Dean McDurmott gave her a fifteen hundred dollar diaper bag when their son Liam was born. Gwyneth Paltrow received a “mama” pendent necklace, Sarah Jessica Parker and Kate Hudson got gold charm bracelets, while Jennifer Gardner was the recipient of a gold necklace with a diamond initial charm.

What do you think of the idea of a push present? Is it too greedy for woman to want her husband to get her a gift? What about the idea that it is an heirloom you can pass down to your child? Is occasionally helping with the baby enough of a gift? Wouldn’t it be nice for a new dad to show his appreciation to the new mom in a tangible way?

Primer For Real Estate Agents: Optimize Presentation Results: 5-Step Approach

Since there are so many licensed real estate professionals, in most regions and locales, doesn’t it make sense, to hone your skills and abilities, and, be able to positively, differentiate yourself, from the rest of the pack? Obviously, real estate agents must focus on their personal skills and abilities, especially when it comes to presenting their ideas, and articulating a quality, effective, listing presentation. Real estate agents should learn from what, are, time – proven, presentation and sales techniques, and presenting more effectively, by being ready, willing and able to answer objections, and address concerns, which motivate and inspire, potential clients, to choose them. Therefore, this article will attempt to briefly examine, consider, and review, an effective, tried- and – proven, 5 – step approach.

1. Listen; learn; ZTL: Quite often, agents begin explaining how great they are, and what they’ll do, before taking the time, or making the effort, to effectively listen, in order to learn, what the perceptions, goals, priorities, etc, of the homeowner are! This step must be performed slowly, and carefully, because, it often impacts, the eventual final results. Only if/ when one, has the discipline to listen fully, and avoid the temptation to interrupt, thus exhibiting the ZTL, or zip – the – lip, and makes the potential client comfortable, does the presentation, get off, on the right – foot!

2. Empathize: Once the first step is effectively followed and performed, and you clearly put yourself in their place, with exhibiting genuine empathy, you begin to make the necessary connection, for the better! Using a simple phrase, such as, I can perfectly understand how you feel. I would feel that way, and so do most others, until they realize a few things, begins the process of making a quality, inspiring presentation.

3. Address concerns; answer objections: When an agent is empathetic, he realizes, every concern and/ or objection, is important to the potential client! Never minimize or assume, anything is obvious, merely because it may be, to you, but take the time, to address every concern, and answer every objection, thoroughly, and to their satisfaction. Pay attention to their body language, and wait, to proceed, until, it appears, they are receptive to your response!

4. Create/ recreate need: Once the first 3 steps have been performed effectively, it’s important to regain, and refocus the discuss, in a way, where you become more capable and ready, to proceed, to convince the other party, you are the one, for them! Therefore, use a phrase, such as, In light of our discussion, and your desire to (then recap what they indicated).

5. Close, and ZTL, again: Nothing occurs, until/ unless you close. While this is the last step, it depends on the how the previous ones, were performed and/ or addressed! A simple line, such as, Doesn’t it make sense, to do the paperwork, so we can achieve your objectives, together? Doesn’t it? Then zip – the – lip, once again, because, the one who speaks first, loses control of the discussion and focus.

While this isn’t complicated, it’s often challenging to maintain the discipline, to proceed, as effectively, as possible. Will you prepare, train, and be ready, to do so?

Understanding the Spanish Present Subjunctive

The subjunctive in Spanish can be described as a “mood”. It is often hard for the student of Spanish to know when to use it. This article deals with the present tense, although there is commonality as to when the subjunctive is used in all its tenses.

Firstly, to explain what I mean about commonality, the subjunctive is used with certain types of verbs, of which there are seven categories:

1. Verbs that express a wish (for example, deseo que, quiero que)

2. Verbs that express doubt or uncertainty (for example, dudo que)

3. Verbs that express possibility or probability (for example, es possible que)

4. Verbs that negate facts (for example, no creo que)

5. Verbs that express feelings (for example, siento que)

6. Verbs that express necessity (for example, necesito que)

7. Verbs of advice (for example, aconsejo que)

Alternatively, it may be easier to remember the WEIRDO formula:

W – Wish, desire, E – Emotion, I – Impersonal expressions, R- Recommendations, D – Doubt, O – Ojal√° (meaning “hopefully”).

Secondly, the subjunctive is always used in the “negative imperative”. Also deemed as a “mood”, the imperative in the affirmative means, for instance, “Sit down”. In the negative, this changes rather obviously to “Don’t sit down”. The difference is that to express the imperative in the affirmative, we use the present indicative tense as our basis and change the endings to imperative ones accordingly. As the imperative is an “order”, it is generally used in the you informal forms in both the singular and the plural. If it goes into the negative, the present subjunctive is applied, as explained. Note that if you need the formal form of you (usted or ustedes), the subjunctive is used automatically.

Thirdly, the subjunctive is also used if there is a change of subject. Let me demonstrate this by example:

Yo quiero que ella haga la cena – I want her to make the dinner. This sentence includes a change of subject from “I” to “her” and thus we need the subjunctive. Note how we also have a verb of “wishing” (querer).

Compare this with:

Yo quiero hacer la cena – I want to make the dinner. There is no change of subject in this sentence, thus the conjugated verb can simply be followed by an infinitive (even though we are using a verb of “wishing”).

Fourth, there needs to be a subordinate clause followed by “que” for the subjunctive to be used (but only if we are using the type of verb out of the seven categories above).

No creo que ella sepa cocinar – I don’t believe she knows how to cook. This answers the question of “what”, i.e., you do not believe what? (Answer: that she knows how to cook). Therefore, the first part of the sentence is the subordinate clause and the second part the main clause. If, by contrast, you wanted to say that you did believe she knows how to cook, you would not use the subjunctive because no doubt is being expressed and whether or not there is a subordinate clause followed by “que” is immaterial.